Thursday 28 July 2011

I stood there seeing.


I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they holding hands
The street lights low
The night so dark
They looked into each other’s eyes
It was the color of love that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
They had killed them
For she was rich and he learned alone
It was the color of hatred that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
They held their child’s hand
And looked at each other while gay
It was the color of nourishment that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
Their son had just thrown them out
They stood alone in dismay
It was the color of betrayal that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
She carried a child and they made merry
She gave birth to a pretty lil girl
It was the color of motherhood that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
Snatched her little one from her hands
She didn’t even feed her well
They killed her in front of her eyes
It was the color of depravity that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
She played with her sort
They giggled and laughed
It was the color of childhood that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
Picked her up from her way to a place dark
She shouted but the beast didn’t keep at bay
Torne her spirits while he tore her clothes apart
And she jumped from the bridge
Only to not let her folks feel ashamed
It was the color of destruction that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
They had managed to sell the pencils at the signals
Had collected a ten chips
A smile so wide for now they will fill
The empty belly that was empty still
It was a color of innocence that I saw
And I stood there seeing

I stood at one end of the bridge
At the other stood they
Went to the vendor with the ten chips
To get a frooti they held their hand forward
He pushed them aside saying it’s for twelve
But ten was all they had
The smile vanished into thin air
Away, looking down they went
It was the color of helplessness that I saw
And I stood there seeing

Who am i?
I may be you, or you or might just be you too
And I keep seeing with a blind eye
Keep hearing with a deaf ear
To what shouldn’t be there and what should be fought
I stand alone at the other end and watch
For I am safe and splendid as yet.

Sunday 24 July 2011

Though i was ready, still the tears fall for you.


I had sailed onto the voyage
Only to see the boat drown
Kept crawling with broken pieces in hands
Pieces of a glass palace that I had built
Thinking of inhabiting with love in there
I was making castles in the air
And someday it had to fall down

I see it failing and it hurts bad
I see the love falling out that we beheld
I see things going wrong and I cannot help
So I wait for the destiny to untie these ends
I cannot take this onus on my head

I saw them holding hands
I saw them feeling bliss
Then I looked into the mirror
And saw how I missed
To be held the way he held her
To be looked at the way he did
To say nothing and still feel it all
To blush away like she did

We had lost it all
What remained were tears and i mourn
I struggled hard to make it fine
But the smiles were replaced by a frown

None to fall back upon
For you were the world
I keep treading this path alone
Bearing the pangs of sorrow
Hoping against the dying hope
Watching the flame of love die out
While the mist of differences make things blurred

You departed while I arrived,
To hold your hand and beg you to stay
All I found was a goodbye note
Your words that said “this won’t work this way”

I crashed into the floor
With eyes that bled
Clutching to the note tight
I cried for help
You were strong enough to tell
Of what I had long beheld
But a hope made me going
That someday we might just reconcile
Till we not altercate of things going sad

But you broke the ice today
You moved forth to things new
And I am left looking into the thin air
With tears that keep falling, calling for you.

Friday 22 July 2011

I wondered, now I believe.

When I looked back today
I saw it the same
Same like I see it everyday
When tried to locate
A tensed brow on your face
All I see is a shudder and then you walk away
I wonder then should i hold on
To these lose ends
I wonder should I still wait
For things to mend
I wonder if you will ever ask me
“baby, lets get back”
And I wonder even more
For I can do nothing else
And its been quite a while now
Since you left it like this
Since you never looked back
Since you never held me
Since you never called to just say I love you
And kept the phone down
Since you never just kissed my cheek
Since you never were any around

Today when I feel stranded
I have not you but someone else
And I wonder if you will ever be
But then I wonder if wondering now will help
So I believe, I should move on like thee.


Wednesday 13 July 2011

I cannot move on.

no i cannot move on
it ain't any easy
as i thought it would be
no i can't escape the essence of your love
that made me feel
i was the one and only

no i cannot move on
from the sight of those eyes
that had tears just to make me stay
and from that smiled that went off
coz i left him in dismay

no i cannot move on
and forgive myself of things that went wrong
and of the choices that proved futile
of promises that i thought to be strong

no i cannot move on when i see that letter
that said i was the world to you
and when i see that tee
that had the picture of us two
that chime each time when sways
with the wind
reminds me of all your prayers
which asked for nothing but me
that watch that tells me
whenever i look for time
that all that was good in it
had left my abode way back when i left
those sandals you got
when you gave up on your shoes
just to see me smile
you didn't care to pay your dues

how do i move on
when each time i think of someone
its just your face that hounds me
when each time i try to love
its just you who define the word for me
when i find it better to die
while crossing the road
than to hold someone else's hand
and when every breath i take
tells me, he was your only man!

no i cannot move on..

Completing the incomplete us!

In the rooms of heart
i open bottles of fragrances
only to find them nil
the lights left me
in the bosom of dark
in the middle

there is this prick in the air
there is this salinity in water
every morning turned into a cruel night
gods possibly are enjoying my plight
they don't seem to love me anymore
for my prayers are going unheard
for they must be least perturbed

as i reminiscent
i gather what must have kept him
from calling my name
for he is a lake
with waves of silences
so whom do i blame?!

do i blame the scene
that led us here
or do i blame myself
for i just wanted times to be better
but never walk out of our sphere

i thought i would take the clouds
in my hand
and squeeze them
but they stormed over me
telling me
nowhere did i stand
i thought i would leave naughty noises
in the silences of the night
but the lull before the storm
was all that was left to my plight

and i am still searching
for the shells of love on the shore
the shore where once we walked
we kissed
and we took the vows
vows of never ending love
vows of life together
only to see them shattered into pieces
that i would gather
to keep alive the memories
and live somehow
to try and change what i did
and to mend the things, for now
i know that only in you can fizzle
the nomadic spilling river of my love
of my life
and of silences that can be read by you alone
and none other

this unseen and unspoken tale
of our love shall soon be read and loved
it will bring back happiness and life
completing the incomplete us..!!

I miss the 'US' more!

there is no one ears
when i shout for no reason
there is no one hands when i cross the road
there is no one to understand
why i blabber like fools
there is no one to say its all right
when i go overboard

there is none i can take for granted
and not revert back
there is none i can ask for things
knowing i will get
there is none i know will care
more than anyone could ever have
there is none i can say will be there
when the times will be sad

there is no shoulder i can cry at
even without a reason
there is no hand that will
wipe these tears off
there is none to whom
i am the most important person
there is none i can share my mind
and feel secure

and so i miss those tables
where we decided of our kitchen counters
and those lamps we though we would keep
those talks of terrace gardens
those false ceilings at CCD
those memorandums of you cooking meals
for all i know is, just to make a maggie

your yes-es to my every erratic bid
your laughter at my saddest joke
your tear when you saw me crying
your eyes which carried all your love
your hies, your byes
your kiss, your hug
that LOVE YOU message
when i went rear
those eyes that led me off
all my fears
those eyes which were always fixed @ my sight
unless my metro left the platform
those eyes whose silences spoke of
our love and our bond

i miss the mustard sauce
i miss the belgian chocolate
i miss the you, i miss the i
i miss the us more
i miss how after every fight we had
you held my hand and never led me go

so why now when i went afar
all you did was to look at me leaving
why didn't you pull me back
to tell me how big a jerk i was
to break the dreams we were weaving
why didn't you just hug me
and never let me go
weren't you the smarter one
and me an asshole?!

i miss the you, i miss the i
i miss the us more..

I end up falling for you!

i won't stay here or would keep there
might pause for a while
but won't remain
for i have no place to call home
and no place that's mine
so i carry the stalk and take my flight

from a tree so full
the wind got me along
i was like a dry leaf
and it blew me all around
away i escaped on to a way
where the harbor i couldn't locate
so kept my feet in the air again
to feel the bliss and do away with pain

sought for a place where no one lived
where there were no ways, no harbor
where i would just sit by myself and someone
who'll undo my ado and shake off the pain

and then i met you and felt life
and then i met me
it was all silent and quite
but still seemed i had comprehended with thee
and i could now remain, could sit there for long
holding hands saying nothing and not feel forlorn

come here and look into my eyes
they'll tell you the stories of my heart

it skips a beat each time you smile
it wanders in your thoughts
the restlessness that crops
the anxiety that i feel
to see you again, each time you leave
i try distraction and different things i pursue
but no matter what i do

i end up falling for you.. 

Accept it or make the change!

and there are times when we see nothing
when it is all suggestive of a blur
and all fragrances stink
and we wonder where we were

when everything around is vicious
and folks seem distant
when the only confinement you get from
is by holding on to your very hand

we wonder what lead us here
cry for a better life
and when nothing seems to work its way
acceptance is what we deny

what i believe of life is
it has to be lived any way
for giving up is a thing for cowards
the braves wait for the benefactor ray

the ray of hope we all call it to be
that shines brighter than Cleopatra's face
and gets with it the showers of bliss
washing away the messy maze

what remains important when the day ends
is the zeal to make it happen
even if didn't work for you today
tomorrow you might just be the captain

so smile away the tears
and kiss away the pains
'cause life can either be accepted
else it can be changed

make your pick  ;)

Your memories haunt.

And i looked into thin air
with nothing on mind
and a face suddenly drew
seemed familiar
..it was you

Had i known little
this is a mere dream
i would never wake up

Had i known little
these senses would remind me of the truth
of you not being here
i would have rejected them
but i am stuck

Still stuck on to the place
where i left everything and moved on
still sitting below that tree
where our love blossomed

Still stuck on to that coffee
which was enough to keep along
still stuck on to your shirts
still stuck on to the love withdrawn

Those pens those games those bills those chairs
the case of my specs
the bag i wear
the bangles the clothes and even the smile i put on
the places i go to
you seem all around
i try to turn my face off
i try to not let your thoughts make a mount
but there is no place that doesn't remind of you
and that is how your memories haunt..

I am still lost.

I am still lost into that world
That world where you left me dejected
When you once saw life in me
That world where sometime ago
We would lay together and kiss

I closed my eyes and saw you right
Right in front of me smiling
You came near and called out my name
I stretched my hand but all in vain
For it was nothing more than a dream

You were so near, yet so far
For a moment it was almost as if
As if I could get you back in my arms
As if nothing went wrong

All by myself
I walked away in seclusion
A tear rolled down my cheek
And I realized it is now but a delusion

These tears hold my pain
Pain of those steps that walked away
Pain of that touch that no more remains
Pain of that name that held my life
Pain of that smile which has now staled

I sighed and cried
Reminiscing those days of spring
When I saw two lovers passing by
To each other they would cling

They sat beside me
Lost in their world
Least oblivious of my presence
Hands held tight
They smiled and remained
How there love seemed to crescent

She laid her head on his shoulder
He kissed her on the brow
They talked of marriage, kids and them getting older
Seemed everything to them god had endowed


How then I wanted to run away
Wanted the earth to tear apart
How I wanted to cry my heart out
For they had awakened the memories of our past

That is how my days go by
And I am more dreaded for the nights
When the sleepless pillow
The broken photo frame
The dumped teddy
That wall which had our name
All stand together and ask me why
Why when I held your love in my every breathe
All I was left to with was to cry

And I lay alone here
Clutching on to my pillow tight
How I wish this night to end
How with time I tussle and fight

Love found.

There was this scent in the air
and u seemed around
a rain drop touched my lips
before it could reach for the ground
it seemed a distant kiss
the kiss we share
the wind played with my hair
the way your fingers take them rear

i danced, i sang, i felt love
i cried aloud to the world
about the life i procured in you
about the love that seemed true

i fogged up the glass
and smiled
wrote your name and kissed
i waited for the dusk to reach out to the dawn
waited for the sun to shine

i would dress in my best
to get his eye on me
and he said baby
'i wouldn't even eye an Angelina Jolie' for your're the prettiest girl i've ever seen

i blushed away with a smile
he pulled me near and kissed
how i wished time to stand still
or to stay a little while before he would leave

i bid him goodbye, left that hand in dismay
saw his face that could put any Brad Pitt to shame
smiled and left i got into the crowd
turned around to see a last glimpse of his
it couldn't have felt any better
when i saw those eyes
still stuck on the sight of me

smiled to myself
i prayed for the love i found
to remain in my life
till i see the dusk and dawn!