Font 35

In every choke down your throat

In every outlandish thought you hide

In your meek smile

In those little blue eyes

In my lipstick stain at your forehead

In your last bite of pizza

In the little bread crumbs on your bed

I reside.

In your prayers sung and unsung

In your sip of warm coffee at the window pane

In the folds of the mattress on your bed

In the musk of your body, in your passionate advances

In your asking for blue but wanting red

In your love said and unsaid

I reside.

But,

In a message on your phone, font 35

Of an ‘I love you’ to someone blonde and white

In a kiss planted on her lips than on mine

In your sudden disposition form beer to wine

In removing the little notes I would leave on your wall

In your ruining my life, in your breaking my heart

In the spaces between your fingers filled by hers

In an unknown fragrance from your last hug

I have died.

Thirty Minutes

Quarter to nine
It started to drizzle
I stood there waiting
Waiting for a little more
Waiting for it to take me by storm
Literally too
Washing away the kohl in my eyes
Those little drops of rain, ran on my face
Slipping down the nape of my neck
Reaching my bosom, they tickled around the navel
Exploring places they haven't been to before
A few settled at the eyelids
Those he touched, kissed and took away on his lips
But I was waiting
Waiting for a little more
Waiting for him to take me by storm.

Quarter past nine
I lay nestled in his arms
After an ordeal thirty minutes long
His fragrance crawled up my body
Settling in my wet hair
Our skin by now was one
The hand of the clock had moved a one eighty
Those that were his, explored a three sixty round.

Deadlocked

A finger taps and then another

Recalling all you ever did, said, taught

The ear-piece lying astray gawks at me

Mocking my feeble advances and aggressive tears

Sunshine yellow and pristine white

A few dresses untouched, cursed

Burn them, do I?

That coffee table across the café cries

Asks me to leave

“You don’t belong here” as if it yelled

And I dragged my feet outside

Head hung low, abreast the nasty wind

I walk, keep walking, still walking

..And yet never walked past by.

Debut Novel

Speaking about my debut novel 'Red is for Love, Black is for Kohl'  tomorrow at the World book fair, Pragati Maidan!

Venue: Hall 1 A
Time: 5.00 PM- 6.00 PM
Event hosted by Lifi Publications.

Drop by?

http://www.newdelhiworldbookfair.gov.in/authorscorner.php

I am afraid.

Don’t ask me why I wore a skirt

Ask them why the mother’s legs

Didn’t make their penis wander about

And violate her modesty, like they did mine.

Don’t ask me why I was out at night

Ask them about the working sister

She is out still, oblivious about the lecherous brothers

Oblivious there might be another eyeing her

She is me, she has a cunt.

If you can’t do this, give me a scar in the face

That never goes

That reminds you, me

Of the wounds that bleed on the outside

As much as they do inside

And reminds everyone with a cunt

That she will always be ‘the other’

Because today I am afraid

Of the empty house

Of the dark night

Of the lonely corridor

Of a shadow nearing mine

Of walking back to the house,

In a slow pace

Today I am afraid

Of half the human race.

Liberation

Make me insignificant.

Like a drop in an ocean,
I want to lose my identity.

A face in the crowd nobody recollects
No names, no tags, no testimony to attest
An existence that I ever beheld.

Erase me from your memory
Let go of all that reads, speaks, feels akin me
I want liberation.

Void stored, Life drained.

Numb you stand and watch

While they take away all you had

No tears will suffice

To bring it back

And then you will stand and watch

Your blood wailing in pain

No words but shriek escaping lips

Eyes blood shot and senses will quit

Only comprehension that remains

Will be synonymous to pain

Muscles will fail you

There won’t be much you could do

Feeble, hopeless, grey you sit

In an empty room, just emptied

With walls that smell and speak of a presence

Whose absence now, forever will prick

This ache will crawl up your toes

Will penetrate your skin, diffusing into the blood

Until it hasn't had fun inflicting your wound

As you twist and turn crying

Which will never be enough

And life will bring you down to your knees

“Bite the dust, you took for me granted”

It will announce and laugh and mock at your pride

Its time you knew, it wasn't yours to ride

You pay the rent and leave one day

A few tears, a day and it will continue its play

Fair or not, it’s not for you to say

Who are you? What are you, anyway?!